Live your best life

It isn't very often that a person's life is changed in mid stream. That something incidental will be seen or heard, and just by being, has a profound effect on the life of another. I've always believed that everything happens for a reason, and yesterday two things happened that just really changed my life. I'm not really sure exactly how just yet, I just know that it's changed.
Let me back up a bit. Yesterday, I was at home with my son, who is now almost 4 weeks old. He's perfect. Gaining weight and smiling at things other than gas, he really is the picture of perfection in my eyes. Yet my husband and I continue to complain that he won't sleep enough at night. ha.
So on a whim, while feeding Little Brother, I watched Oprah. Really, I had nothing better to do. And it has changed my life. I won't go into detail just yet, except to say that when it was over, both my husband and I were in tears, and realizing how selfish we'd been in our recent complaints of sleepless nights. If only we'd known.... I've attached the link at the bottom of this entry,titled 99 Balloons. After you've read this (and only after you've read it), please take a moment to watch the video that has turned me into this blubbering sap.
So, as yesterday progressed, I put all of my new found emotion into the back of my mind, and then, later, I read my friend Gs blog. Now mind you, I read her blog every day. I live, in a sense, to read Gs heartfelt ramblings about her latest Friday nights, or about DD, the man she'll never learn to stop loving. I live vicariously through her. But on this particular day, there was no talk of stupid men or rants about her latest work day. No, yesterday, she wrote merely of 12 things that make her smile. She spoke of taking a moment to realize what really is important in life and appreciating it for what it is. I knew then that I would make this entry. I hope that you understand.
I cannot tell you why I feel the way I do about all of this. Maybe you'll get it, maybe you won't. Either way, know that when I saw 99 Balloons, I wanted more for myself. I felt shameful for my selfishness and joy at my blessings.
Don't watch this video at work. It's the best advise I can give you. If you still insist on doing so, just know that I warned you. It is full of love, hope and selflessness. When the mother in this video was asked how she lived every day, she replied, "I said to myself- today's not the day to be sad. I can be sad another day. Today, I'm just going to be happy with what is. Maybe tomorrow I'll be sad, but not today."
So, there you have it. Take a moment to watch this. Then spend a moment and take stock in your life. Then live it the best that you can.

99 Balloons- click here

My Cup Runneth Over: Another Big Day!

Well, at my dear friend's prodding (yes JMS, I'm referring to you!) I'm sitting to post about the birth of my son, who I'll call Little brother. He was finally gifted to us on Thursday, October 2nd at 9:06am. He weighed in at 9lbs, 6oz and 19.5 inches long. Needless to say, Big Brother is in awe of him, and is um, well... let's just say... very helpful. Mostly, he's just proud to be Big Brother!
The birthing process was fine. I had a C-section that was mostly uneventful. I'd take it any day over the process I endured when having Big Brother. This time, aside from having some difficulty with the epidural (they weren't able to "find the space"- twice).. they ended up giving me a spinal block- twice, which caused me to vomit violently during the entire procedure- it was a little bit of heaven. Little brother had a minor setback after birth, and had some bad white cells - they call them "bands"- that caused him not to eat well and to drop down to 8lbs 4 oz in only 3 days. To alleviate risk of too great a loss, they tubed him, and fed him through the tube in his nose for the first few days.



He was simply beautiful- is still. Of course, now he's 16 days old. He looks just like his father. I love it! It's taken a bit of adjustment at home. The C-section does take a little more out of me than I expected- even more than I actually feel at times. But at the end of the day, I feel it in a big way and find that I simply cannot function. Hubby has been good to take a day off from work here or there. He took the first week off, but after his return from work, he's been here as needed. I'm so blessed in that sense. I'm fully aware of all the women out there who have little to no support from their spouses at all. It really just doesn't occur to them to care enough to help out their wives. Me, I'm the lucky one. My husband will stay up all night and then go to work for a normal day, just so he can "help out" as much as possible. I really am fortunate. And I'm ashamed to say that sometimes I've had no choice but to take him up on his offer and selfishly sleep through the night while he suffers through another sleepless night. I keep thinking that I'll wake up tomorrow and feel 100%. I have a sinking suspicion that it's going to take longer than I'm willing to admit to get back up to par. Oh well.. enough about me.
Having a 2nd child is definitely an experience. And it's one that I wouldn't trade for anything in the world. I keep looking at them thinking "the kids. I'm now a mother of the kids". I have to continuously remind myself that if referring to "my son" I now have to specify which son I'm speaking of! How great is that? I couldn't ask for anything more. One of my favorite lines from the movie Hope Floats, comes to mind: "MY CUP RUNNETH OVER"
What more could I possibly ask for in life?